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x Jenny from tha block x

Tuesday, November 25, 2003

9:34PM - umm....yeah

if rhyme was a drug I'd sell it by the gram.......fuck if I know why that's in my head! Anyways, work was good today and I just found out the other day that aesop rock is coming. Hopefully matt will go with me. My friend Sandra is spending thanks giving with me, should be quite interesting for her to meet my fam....well, nothing too terribly exciting happened today so I guess that's it. fuck off.

Current mood: bitchy

Monday, November 24, 2003

4:59PM - weekend update

well, lets see. I went to the Killswitch engage, lamb of god show on Saturday....fucking amazing!! Then went out to dinner with matt and met up with andy,james, angela and alaina. Goodtimes with good friends!! Shell, we missed ya! Friday night I hung out with Britt, Eily, ben and timotay. Which was equally as fun!!! Yesterday I met up with Neil and the gang for lunch at plaid. I miss Neil!!!! Come backmore often you fuck!! Shit, one week from today and I move in to the coolest lil place ever!! I am so excited. Michelle and I are going to have a pimp pad. Yeah!!!! I am so giddy right now just thinking about it!! god, I am so gay, anyways that was my weekend.

Current mood: anxious

Monday, November 17, 2003

9:51PM - ummm....

well, today was eventful. I went in for some extra hours at work, met up with Brittany for some girl talk and now I am at Michelle's. Nothing too terribly exciting happened today, but it was good. talk about an exciting entry!

Current mood: accomplished

Sunday, November 16, 2003

5:23PM - long time no write

damn, a lot has happened since I last wrote, but unfortunately it's too much to put in here. Life has been great!! Michelle and I got our apartment and we movein on the 1st of december. YEAH!!!! I am painting my room baby pink and black. We are going to have so much living together!!!! We are already planning our eviction with big ass party...hehehehehe!! I really wanna go back to school. I think that would be the icing on my cake. I only have like two semesters left so, we'll see.They may not let me back in because of my shitty GPA. On another note this weekend was hella fun,as per usual. Alright, I am outtie!!!

Current mood: I'm so excited!!!!

Wednesday, October 22, 2003

10:21PM - I fucking hate the power ball!!!

so, I really thought me an Britt were gonna win. We had plans, houses already built, beach front property, houses in the south of france and bad ass cars. God damn it!! Oh well, that's what I get for being a crazy dreamer :-) well, back to reality, I think Ryan likes me. He is so cute, but he has girlfriend. But he can't resist the ol' Jenny charm hehehehehe! Anyways we'll see. I have had enough boy drama for the rest of my life just from this month alone.

Current mood: dissapointed boo hoo!!

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

9:36PM - i got my life back!!!

Okay, so its official, I now am stress free for the time being and can start enjoying my life again. This month has really made me reflect on how carelessly I live my life. I finally realized that yeah, it's okay to spontaneous but shit i really need to think about the consequences once in a while. I think things are gonna be just fine!!

Current mood: Yee Ha!!

Sunday, October 19, 2003

11:08PM - Yeah, i fucked up again

"Oh great, here I go again. I'm stuck in this rut, not sure how to begin. or should tell you everything oh oh, feeling out of luck. so i won't see u soon. cuz i know its too soon, for u to see me. if this is the last thing u do, just tell me that its okay for me, to have these feelings for u when it's normal to want to call u. oh I'm dialing the phone, letting it ring for hours. pretending to hear your voice. why does my heart always beat before yours does? after a while you can. make yourself believe in almost anything.....for making myself believe in u."

Current mood: stressed to the fucking hilt

Friday, October 17, 2003

9:46PM - why do I do the things I do?

You know how everyone is really good at something? Well, I am really good at fucking things up and making my life hard for myself. I make stupid decisions and half to sweat til the consequences come. god, why am I so stupid?? I always live life for that moment and don't think in advance. I am really stressed and I think I am making myself very sick over it. I am just glad I have amazing friends who love me, faults and all. You know who you are! thank you :-)

Current mood: worried

Monday, October 13, 2003

2:24PM - silly lil survey

A - Act your age - 22 on the outside, 12 on the inside
B - Boyfriend - ummm...yeah fucking right
C - Chore you hate - picking up my clothes
D - Dad's name - Tom Arnold
E - Essential make up item - fruity lip stuff
F - Favorite actor - Johnny Depp
G - Gold or silver - Silver
H - Hometown - Phoenix
I - Instruments you play - clarinet, don't hate
J - Job title - financial advisor
K - Kids - hell no
L - Living arrangements - I live at my grandma's....shut the fuck up with the laughs.
M - Mom's name - Cindy Arnold
N - Number of people you've slept with - five
O - Overnight hospital stays - one
P - Phobia - spiders, clowns and heights
Q - Quote you like - "the suckers lose themselves in the games they love to play"
R- Religious affiliation - lutheran and catholic
S - Siblings - 1 brother, (19) Jake
T - Time you wake up? - depends
U - Unique habit - Ummmm.....twisting my hair
V - Vegetable you refuse to eat - I love veggies~~~
W - Worst habit - I do not wish to disclose
X - X-rays you've had - head, mouth, chest
Y - Yummy food you make - waffles
Z - Zodiac Sign - gemi

Current mood: ugh

2:00PM - could you look me in the eyes?

Hmmm.....nothing exciting has really changed since the last time I wrote. Well, this girl from my highschool that I used to be friends with is on All my Children, that's pretty cool. Her characters name is Babe, go figure. What else do you name a girl who is super beautiful and has it all. Fucking bitch! Ummmm, this weekend was interesting, and by interesting I mean hella great, just in a weird way. Ummm, I am still a lot stressed out about the lack there of of something I need to come (yeah, that make any sense??). Ummm....Danny looks hot in Melissa's thong and pj pants...tee hee. Anyways I am at my mom's house right now chillin and kinda bored. My mind is going a mile a minute right now. Nothing is really making much sense now, so I am going to live everday to the fullest. I love Eily and Ben to death and this is my last thought I wish to share. Alrighty then!

Current mood: really stressed out

Tuesday, September 30, 2003

3:16PM - anything with more than four legs should die!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, I actually called into work today so I could periodically
drift off to sleep. Who's pathetic?? Sleep is honestly my favorite thing to do. I know a lot of you can agree, so don't hate. Anyways, tonight I am going out to dinner with Nolan, Sha-Sha, Felina and Michelle to discuss the bands and fans softball tourney. It's gonna be so much fun this year!! Anyways, keep your fingers crossed that I get this job at USAA. I would be rollin in skrilla and would be so financially set!!!
P.S last night after I kidded about having nightmares from the spider, it really fucking happened. AHHHHHHHH!!!!!! That's why I am so damn tired today, running from creepy ass spiders can wear you the fuck out.

Current mood: I hate creepy crawlies!

3:08AM - my day and my thoughts

1.) I slept in til' passions started. hell yes that show rocks.
2.) went over to Nolan's house.
3.) went out to Native with Meeshka.
4.) went for a three mile walk and almost got killed by a nasty ass spider. Great, there's tonights nightmare.
5.) submitted a resume to USAA, come on Jamie show me the money baby!
5.) sitting here at my computer like a lame ass, slept too much today.....imagine that!!
6.) I really want someone to cuddle with me.... boo hoo!! So sad and so lonely.
7.) thinking about how much living in a retire community sucks, yes folks I live in a retirement community...it's fucking hopping until 6 pm.
8.) I really miss Lily! I wish she would call me...hint hint
9.) I would love to get a new car. One that doesn't explode or squeak.
10.) I want big boobs and a tiny waste, with a lil' bit a money and a lot of hard work it could happen.
11.) heard the new WED cd, and it was amazing
12.) ummmm.....I think that's about it. Good night!!

Current mood: accomplished

Sunday, September 28, 2003

6:31PM - yeah!

I had a great weekend!!

Current mood: highly amused

Sunday, September 21, 2003

10:09PM - long time no write

well, i guess the reason i haven't written i a while is cuz nothing really exciting has been going on. I had a good weekend though. I saw Ferris Bueller with my girls last night. That movie never get old! Michelle has baby spiders living in her eye, work has been going alright, Brittany is real sick, my car seems to be doing okay, my blond roots are starting to show I think I might just let my hair grow out, boys and the lack there of and well that is about it. I saw cold creek manor this weekend with my folks. Stephen Dorff is so fucking hot! It was a pretty good movie. Ummm, that's really about it. I've lost a couple pounds, I know because my pants are loosing up. Thank god I think my ghetto booty is shrinking!! Well, I guess that's it. Good night!
p.s any one heard the new saves the day??? I wanna hear some feed back.

Current mood: bored off my ass

Tuesday, September 16, 2003

10:04PM - dance dance revolution

so Britt and I were at sonic and they were playing Junior Seniior. Oh, I wish Jared was there. He would have appreciated it. Brittany Spears was in Vegas this weekend, missed her by a month and Michelle and I are going walking tomorrow morning at 7:00 a.m. Can you say bitchy?? Anyways, today was alright. I put in my nine hours so I feel accomplished. I am going to work for southwest airlines so I can leave this god forsaken state when I want to....for free!!! We'll see, I hear they don't pay much and I really need the skrilla. Well, that's about it.

Current mood: determined

Monday, September 15, 2003

6:00PM - wiping the slate clean

I am done with bullshit. So I guess that means I am done with you. Sooner or later everyone will find out that you talk shit on them and I wanna be there when we all turn our backs on you. I guess this really applies to more than one person. Guilty conscience anyone????

Current mood: I hate shit talkers

Tuesday, September 9, 2003

10:38PM - fuck this

why is it that people whom are supposed to be the closest to you have no idea when they have hurt you? and then they come up with some excuse as to why they think you feel the way you do? honestly, I am too simple for this bullshit. the only thing i care about are my friends, family and music. three simple things and some how those three things always manage to fuck with my heart and my head. i don't know call me crazy but I pride myself on being a good person and think the golden rule is fucked up. do unto others can suck my ass. what a bunch of bull shit. if it's any consulation i hope we can work things out, but its not in my court anymore. you know how i feel. and you mr. i am god's gift to everyone, what happened to you? i used to think you were the greatest guy and all of a sudden your head got way too big and now you treat me like shit. wait, not just me everyone. why??? oh, well i am done trying to figure my friends out. honestly i love you all, yes even you, and i don't have an explanation. Meesh, i care more about you than you know but I would really like you to be in my corner as I am in yours. anyone who knows me knows that i am the easiest person to get along with. why are you always making everything a fight? fighting is fucking gay when there is no battle to be won. i just want people to understand that all i wanna do is live my life and have fun. why is this so hard for you to understand. honestly you will read this and not care. or maybe not know i am talking about you. but i think you really need to start picking your battles because making people feel like shit is really fucking dumb. get a hobby if that's what it takes. I have no hard feelings, just a loss of respect for you. i know you don't care, but at least i feel better after writing these ramblings.

Monday, September 8, 2003

12:05AM - ugh

Rescue me!!!

Current mood: aggravated

Saturday, September 6, 2003

12:05AM - fuck fuck fuckety fuck fuck

life is really shitty right now. I find myself lonely and sad. I am so pathetic that the only thing that has made me happy this week is the memories of suicide file from last Sunday. My car is broken again, and I am really sick. People aren't always what they seem, and no matter how much we love them and want them to change, we should realize they won't. No one deserves to feel like shit, especially coming from someone close to you. Oh, well life is shit right now and I don't really see a light at the end of the tunnel. I am tired of being optimistic cause all it does it hurt worse when things fuck up. Story of my life, maybe I will just turn into a crabby bitch and treat people mean, and then maybe I will get respect. But why should I compromise my character just so people won't walk all over me. FUCK THAT!!!!! I don't know what I want anymore, or how I feel inside. I am all fucked up and don't really have a clue how to fix it. I wish someone cared enough about me for once to try and help me fix myself. I am always everyone else's punching bag and crutch. When will someone give them self to me?
"we can't tell what we want from what we need, or which one matters more. it's all spinning mobile, it's all a catchy lullaby. everything is gonna be alright so suck your thumb."

Current mood: fucking sad

Monday, August 25, 2003

7:47PM - hmmm

well, not much to write about today. I started this new pill popping diet that seems to be going well. No it's not ephedra, although that would work a hell of a lot faster. Michelle, Britt and I are supposed to go running. Yeah, that'll be funny. Stopping every two seconds to catch our breath and yelling at eachother about slowing down. Oh, it'll be fun... *sarcasm overload*. Anyways, Lily I wish you were coming with us. Fuck IHOP!! I know, it pays the bills, stupid me. Anyways, I must go so I can run and watch tv til the girls call. No wonder I beat the boys away with a baseball bat, I am just too fucking exciting!! Night, Night lj buddies. I love you!! xoxox posi hugs and kisses :-) hehehehe!!

Current mood: awake

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